There has been a life altering event for me during the last thirty days. It was unexpected; it snatched the rug from under everything else in my neatly ordered little world, and as the first phase of it drew to a close I knew, once again, how little control any man has over how his life will unfold.



The unpredictability and the numerous different ways that unpredictability impacted my life and the lives of those around me amaze. Nothing stayed the same. No one stayed the same. The world as we all knew it disappeared and a new world with uncharted, rugged terrain took its place.



I found myself far away from home, away from all my comforts and familiarities, somehow struggling to adapt to where I was and what was required of me. I was forced to dig into all my emotional and spiritual reserves, but it didn’t take long before those both felt they were running very low. But something happened that allowed me to recharge some of my energies and dig a little deeper in order to keep moving forward. Without solicitation some of my cyber writing friends – friends that I had not and still, in a couple of instance, have not ever seen in the flesh – rallied to my side and to my back to give me support at the moments I needed it most.



For nearly five years I’ve been a part of a small writing collective; a group in which we exchange writing ideas, writing related information, collaborate on occasion projects, and, because of the convenience of the internet, we formed the habit of touching base with one another virtually every day. A friendship as solid as cement has emerged from this cyber networking, but one we frequently laugh about because it has become so strong sight unseen.



As I grappled with the grief of the sudden loss of an immediate family member I really wasn’t expecting that this would be the occasion when I’d meet one of my cyber writing friends, but it was. She and another writing friend came and joined my family and me in our efforts to prepare emotionally for the funeral. What an extraordinary surprise it was to see her! I live in Kansas City, she lives in Chicago, but there she was ringing the doorbell to be by my side and lend that very special emotional support in Detroit.



Little did the friend who came to Detroit know how much support one of our other friends within our small group had been providing on an almost hour by hour basis as I had traveled across country trying to reach my family member in time to say goodbye. By phone, text, and email she had helped me keep my balance until I reached my destination successfully in time. Her support was too critical to ever be able to measure. But she and I have yet to meet. Some day soon though, we will!



Sometimes we talk about how cutthroat and competitive our industry can be, but I think as writers we bring a special kind of compassion to life and a unique understanding of it as well. I just need to take a moment to acknowledge the four I’m closest too and thank them for helping me weather this most difficult storm. Thank you Shelia Goss, Carla Curtis, Linda Dominique Grosvenor, and Cherlyn Michaels. You are all extraordinary human beings.




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